For this blog I wanted to touch on a personal story. I wanted get in touch with a couple that has dealt with the hardships of such a relationship. After doing a bit of research, I stumbled across an article by Mark Mathabane. This article was titled interrational myths still nag couples.
Mathabane begins by describing an experiencehe and his wife shared while promoting their book, Love in Black and White. He goes on to describe a situation in which the entirety of the auditorium was evacuated due to a bomb threat. The threat was made by a person who disapproved of interracial relationships.
Being that this occurred in 1992, the author admits that attitudes towards interracial couples have changed for the better. It starts getting really interesting when he begins to speak about the myths and stereotypes that exist in the shadow of the greater acceptance. Mathabane describes a few commmon myths that haunt the interracial world. Peole seem to misunderstand and attribute them to superficial foundations.
He continues his article by countering and bring light to some realities of interracial couplings. the point he makes is that in many interracial couples one or both partners make a lot of sacrifice to make the realtionship work. He states "one parter was disowned by parents or ostericized by friends and relations for loving across races". Why would one make such a large sacrifice fro a superficail cause?
As support for his claim that interracial marriages tend to last longer than same race marriage, he explains that interracial couples seldom take anything for granted. To prove his point, Mathadane outlined some harsh stereotypes that interracial couples face on a daily basis....even in our " modern, non racist society". People often attribute interracial dating negitively rather then positively. A white woman has a low self esteem for dating a black man or black men see white women as trophies. These are just a couple of the stereotypes that Mathabane outlines in his article. His argument is that people often have greater confidence levels in interracial realtionships, because they have to endure such scrutitny and still overcome it.
Mathabane begins by describing an experiencehe and his wife shared while promoting their book, Love in Black and White. He goes on to describe a situation in which the entirety of the auditorium was evacuated due to a bomb threat. The threat was made by a person who disapproved of interracial relationships.
Being that this occurred in 1992, the author admits that attitudes towards interracial couples have changed for the better. It starts getting really interesting when he begins to speak about the myths and stereotypes that exist in the shadow of the greater acceptance. Mathabane describes a few commmon myths that haunt the interracial world. Peole seem to misunderstand and attribute them to superficial foundations.
He continues his article by countering and bring light to some realities of interracial couplings. the point he makes is that in many interracial couples one or both partners make a lot of sacrifice to make the realtionship work. He states "one parter was disowned by parents or ostericized by friends and relations for loving across races". Why would one make such a large sacrifice fro a superficail cause?
As support for his claim that interracial marriages tend to last longer than same race marriage, he explains that interracial couples seldom take anything for granted. To prove his point, Mathadane outlined some harsh stereotypes that interracial couples face on a daily basis....even in our " modern, non racist society". People often attribute interracial dating negitively rather then positively. A white woman has a low self esteem for dating a black man or black men see white women as trophies. These are just a couple of the stereotypes that Mathabane outlines in his article. His argument is that people often have greater confidence levels in interracial realtionships, because they have to endure such scrutitny and still overcome it.
In addition, Mathabane talks about what it means to have multi-racial children and what things they may face. He says that his children have an advantage because they feel comfortable with all groups. They fit in the white and black communities, as well as other diverse groups of people. His hope as that his children will be examples of unity and compassion for diversity and not victims of opression and judgement.
This is a great story about how people can take the negativity society places on interracial dating and turn them into positives. Rather then breaking down from the difficulty, they were able to become a stronger and more unified couple because of it. It shows that great things can happen when people keep an open mind.
you can read this article at http://www.usatoday.com/news/opinion/2001-08-22-ncguest2.htm
3 comments:
I came across an online community for individual seeking interracial love. It is ++++((((---Blackwhitemeet. C O M))))++++ All singles there are seeking interracial relationships. Interracial is not a problem here, but a great merit to cherish!
It is a shame that it is 2008 and people are still worried about people from different ethnic backgrounds getting married. Since when was marriage an issue of race? Since when did someone become your "soul mate" because of their race. Marriage is about love; you marry someone because you are in love with them, no matter where they come from. Marriage should be color blind, but I am ashamed to say that in our "melting pot" society there are people who think it shouldn't be.
Our society makes it tough on interracial children as well. I come from a mixed ethnic background, so I can tell you it isn't easy. The way our (society's) notions are constructed about race are very 50/50. What i mean by that is there is no in between. If one doesn't exhibit all of the characteristics associated with a certain race, they are basically left out, and have no complete identity of who they are.
Basically, one should be able to marry whoever they fall in love with, it shouldn't matter if they are black, white, japanese, chinese, or whatever. Love is Love people. Appreciate it.
Of all the issues going on around the nation, it is amazing how much people can fixate on the issue of interracial couples. The fact that mixed couples have a better track record for lasting longer, then same race couples can probably be attributed to many things. First, without support of family, many of these individuals have to rely solely on one another. They must work harder to make their relationship healthy, meaningful and stable. Also, when people look outside their own race for potential partners, they are expanding their chances at finding "the one." They are no longer limited by the constraints of exclusively dating within their race. This opens the door to find a partner based purely on compatibility, not convenience. Lastly, I think these couples can strive because of the many opportunities for expansion of knowledge. Since many of these people bring into the relationship two, perhaps very different, cultural ideals there is much room for learning. I imagine this could be a very fun and wonderful way for these couples to connect, by sharing their cultural backgrounds. It is for these reasons that they are likely building stronger foundations than same race couples.
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